Hi, I am Constance (this is not my real name…).
To describe a little myself, I am 27 year old girl, the girl next door type, with an ever smiling baby face and (almost) always good mood. Also, I’m originally from the Netherlands: therefore, please excuse any grammar mistakes / typos…
I grew up in a really small village in the Netherlands- I had a quiet and sheltered childhood. However I was always a little freaky- a part of me just wanted to do all kinds of stuff and I couldn’t deter myself from doing it… For example, when playing barbie with my (female) friends, I would always put them in outfits which made them look like prostitutes. Or for example I often played “doctor-games” with my friends, when they came for a sleep-over (or when I came to their houses). My imagination towards boys started to rally pretty fast as well. I think I was hyperactive. My adolescence was filled with perverse dreams and oftentimes touching myself… there were times when I had to go to the toilet because I couldn’t handle my horniness anymore.
A recurring theme in my dreams is getting spanked. For years and years now, I have fought my urges that I wanted to be spanked. It felt really erotic, but much more than that, I always felt some shame when thinking about it. I tried to forget these kinky thoughts, since I didn’t understand why I yearned this: it’s embarrassing, after all.
At the other hand, I am a really shy person. I have a quiet voice and don’t like to speak up. The few times when had to do a presentation in school, I was sweating heavily and had a wildly beating heart after that.
And of course, my relationship with men was difficult as well. I have no siblings and therefore my parents were extremely protective of me (a curse which every only child probably has..). That and the fact that I grew up in a really small town led to me being a late bloomer. I had my first kiss at 18 after a school party (and it was really awkward with this guy, maybe I will talk about this some other time). Also, I was a brat to the few boyfriends I had, I literally begged them to be spanked and taken, but most didn’t. And I felt to ashamed to talk openly about it.
Although I had some encounters since then, I wanted to keep my virginity for someone special. And then, during my during my term abroad here in the US, I met him: Mark. He is the best man I could imagine… I could go into details, but that would take days. Since then, it went really fast: I went back to finish my degree and then moved to him here in the east coast. however, in 2013 we had our first daughter. Since then, I became a stay at home mom- I care for our family and it makes me happy. However, our marriage lacked a little in the bedroom… more precisely, I’m vastly more sexual than him. And by that, I mean really vastly. But with certain adjustments in the last years, our marriage has ever grown and I can confirm that sexually speaking it’s now better than ever. Especially since I found that I like being submissive- and Mark likes to be dominant…
How we got there and how our daily lives are will be the topic of my blog…